Here’s a good tip just in case you go to prison and you’re getting worried you might get raped if you drop the soap.

Step 1

Drop The soap. This will cause several large, muscley men to look at you deviously, furrowing their brow in expectation of the pleasure that is to come. Now is a good time to start whimpering in terror.

Step 2

Slide the front of one of your feet under the bar of soap.

Step 3

Place your other foot on top of the original foot.

Step 4

Finally, slide the soap with your top foot up your calf and, if you can, up part of your hip. While you are moving the bar gracefully up your leg you should be semi-squatting and grabbing for the soap. Make sure you keep your ass tilted towards the ground as to avoid any attacks/insertions.

Step 5

Breathe a sigh of relief as you continue to shower without anal violation.

There you have it! Simple, yet invaluable to more attractive incarcerated criminals who shower regularly.

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Tags: Bathroom, how to pick up the soap, soap